Connor Miggan, England
The schools are closed, not really.
He used just enough words to make a headline for those who won’t read further down, and enough to complicate it.
First they asked for volunteers. I said no. I was tempted at one point to resign in the name of safety. I can control everything within the walls of my own home. It’s a peculiarly first world problem to want lockdown. But, with lock down I can keep everyone safe.
Once we knew what it was to be “essential” it was no longer voluntary. We were called to work. It felt a bit like a draft. At that point I was pretty suddenly finished being upset. There’s nothing to be conflicted about now.
So I’m gonna take the necessary safety precautions, if an exemption for people living with vulnerable people lets me out of my essential status then so be it. But I won’t do it underhandedly. No phoned in fake sick days. If it’s got to be, it may as well be fun. So I’m going to make an idiot of myself to make the children laugh.
We millennials are taught to own our feelings. Sit and dwell in our feelings. That, “It’s ok not to be ok” and that you get space and time out till you’re ready to go on. That’s not going to get the job done right now. You can get down and sit in your feelings, then what? It’s still there.
It’s Saturday, the weeds are coming back in and there’s whiskey. Apparently you sink to the level of your training. Apparently mine is Catholic.
Thinking about the grocery store workers and the delivery drivers. Those of us working in education, first responders and medical professionals have always felt a sense of calling and fulfillment to what we do. If there are people working for Asda who feel that same sense of fulfillment from their work then I’ll hold me hands up and apologize but from personal experience I can’t help but doubt it. Now they don’t even have a choice.
Thinking about plans I promised to reschedule 3 weeks ago, when April was open and full of promise.
Sunday night my son got a fever, and kept it. Parents will know this, the nights that feel like they’ll never end. Dave and Ava’s nursery rhymes at 2am, we don’t listen to it anymore unless he’s sick. Nursery rhymes are bad for their language development apparently, but nothing soothes better.
14 days the doctor said.
A spectrum of short lived emotions: fear, guilt. Worry.
I didn’t expect to be frustrated though. What do you even have to be frustrated about? You didn’t want to go anyway.